I spent so many years in terror of 'making it legal' because the expression rang all too true - the wedding ritual struck me as nothing but a flowery front for the fulfilment of countless, tedious contracts and obligations.

Lynn Coady’s quote reflects a critical view of the institution of marriage and the ritual of the wedding. She expresses her fear of "making it legal" because she sees the formal act of marriage as something that transforms a personal relationship into a series of legal contracts and obligations, stripping away the romantic or emotional elements. The phrase "the wedding ritual struck me as nothing but a flowery front" suggests that Coady sees the ceremony as an outward display that hides the more mundane and practical realities of marriage, such as legal responsibilities and social expectations.

Coady’s reluctance to "make it legal" reveals a deeper skepticism about the traditional view of marriage as a sacred or inevitable step in a relationship. Rather than seeing marriage as a union founded on love and emotional connection, she feels it is more about conforming to societal norms and adhering to a legal framework that often carries heavy burdens, such as financial responsibilities, legal rights, and duties. This view positions marriage as an institution more focused on obligations than the freedom and joy of personal choice and mutual affection.

The reference to contracts and obligations points to the way that legal marriage introduces a formal structure to what could otherwise be a more fluid or flexible relationship. Coady seems to suggest that by formalizing a partnership through marriage, people may be placing themselves under the weight of expectations, rather than nurturing a relationship for its own sake. Her perspective is grounded in the modern questioning of traditional institutions and the belief that relationships should not be bound by legal requirements but should instead be based on mutual respect and personal choice.

The origin of this quote comes from Coady’s own reflections on the institution of marriage, likely shaped by her experiences and observations as a writer and commentator on modern life. As an author and essayist, Coady often explores themes of individual freedom and societal expectations, and this quote is a critique of the societal pressures that marriage can impose. It reflects her broader perspective on how legal and social conventions often shape personal choices in ways that may not always align with individual desires or happiness.