The first breath of adultery is the freest; after it, constraints aping marriage develop.

John Updike’s quote, "The first breath of adultery is the freest; after it, constraints aping marriage develop," reflects his exploration of the complexities and contradictions inherent in adultery and marriage. Updike suggests that the initial act of adultery—the first breath—is often experienced as a form of liberation or freedom, as it is an act outside the bounds of traditional commitment and societal expectations. It is a break from the constraints of monogamy, offering an illicit sense of excitement and spontaneity.

The second half of the quote, "after it, constraints aping marriage develop," highlights the irony that even in the world of infidelity, the consequences often mimic the institution of marriage. Over time, the excitement and freedom of adultery can give way to the same restrictions and obligations that exist in marriage, such as secrecy, guilt, and the emotional and logistical complexities of maintaining an affair. Updike suggests that adultery, like marriage, eventually becomes governed by its own set of rules and expectations, eroding the initial sense of freedom.

This quote reflects Updike’s broader themes of desire, commitment, and the human condition, which often appear in his works. Known for his exploration of intimacy and the intricacies of relationships, Updike often wrote about the tension between personal freedom and the expectations imposed by society or family life. In this context, he critiques the idea that any romantic relationship—whether adulterous or marital—can ever be entirely free of constraints, even when it appears so at first.

The origin of this quote is rooted in Updike’s literary focus on the complexities of human relationships. His works, such as Rabbit, Run and The Witches of Eastwick, often examine the inner lives of his characters and their struggles with fidelity, love, and the expectations of marriage. Updike’s insight into the ironies of infidelity and the inherent contradictions in human behavior underscores his deep understanding of the often unpredictable dynamics of relationships.