That a marriage ends is less than ideal; but all things end under heaven, and if temporality is held to be invalidating, then nothing real succeeds.

John Updike’s quote, “That a marriage ends is less than ideal; but all things end under heaven, and if temporality is held to be invalidating, then nothing real succeeds,” offers a reflective perspective on the impermanence of life and relationships. Updike, an American novelist and short story writer known for his nuanced explorations of human relationships, suggests that while the end of a marriage is unfortunate, it is part of the natural course of life, where all things—whether relationships or life itself—are subject to the passage of time. The statement invites readers to confront the idea that everything in life is temporary, including marriage, and that this temporality does not diminish its validity or worth.

In this context, Updike is acknowledging that the dissolution of a marriage can be seen as a failure or disappointment, but he also points out that all things in life are transient. His reference to temporality highlights the inevitability of endings in human existence. He challenges the notion that the temporary nature of things—whether a marriage, a relationship, or even life itself—invalidates their meaning or importance. Instead, he proposes that temporality is a fundamental aspect of the human experience, and it is by embracing it that individuals can find lasting value and meaning in their experiences.

By suggesting that “nothing real succeeds” if temporality is viewed as invalidating, Updike implies that the marriage or relationship itself, though it may come to an end, can still be valuable and meaningful during its course. The focus should not be solely on the duration or permanence of a bond but on the genuine experiences shared and the growth that occurs within it. He seems to be saying that true success in life comes not from striving for permanence, but from embracing the fleeting, transient nature of all things, including relationships.

Ultimately, Updike’s quote is a meditation on the fragility of human connections and the reality of marriage as an evolving, temporal experience. By recognizing the impermanence of marriage and life, he suggests that we should appreciate the moments and growth that occur within these relationships, without being overly concerned about their ultimate end. It’s a call to value the present and the real, even when faced with the certainty of change.