Almost no one is foolish enough to imagine that he automatically deserves great success in any field of activity; yet almost everyone believes that he automatically deserves success in marriage.
In this quote, Sydney J. Harris contrasts the expectations people have in different aspects of life, particularly in terms of success. He points out that, generally, people do not assume they are entitled to great success in a professional or competitive field without effort and skill. However, when it comes to marriage, many people tend to believe that success in this area is automatic, simply because of the desire or expectation for it. Harris is highlighting the naivety or unrealistic expectations people often have about relationships, assuming that love and commitment alone are enough for a successful marriage.
Harris’s statement suggests that, unlike other pursuits where success is seen as something that must be earned through hard work, learning, and growth, marriage is often viewed as something that should come naturally or without significant effort. He implies that many people fail to realize that maintaining a healthy marriage requires ongoing effort, communication, and compromise, much like any other area where success is sought.
The origin of this quote comes from Harris's broader reflections on human nature and societal attitudes toward relationships. As a columnist and social commentator, Harris was known for his keen observations on the contradictions and assumptions that shape human behavior. His writing often sought to challenge conventional thinking and highlight the inconsistencies in how people approach various aspects of their lives.
In essence, Harris's quote serves as a reminder that success in marriage, like any other goal, does not come without effort and growth. It encourages a more realistic understanding of relationships, urging individuals to put in the necessary work to nurture and maintain a partnership, rather than assuming it will automatically succeed based on external factors like love or desire.
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