I'm a fun father, but not a good father. The hard decisions always went to my wife.

In this quote, John Lithgow reflects on his role as a father, acknowledging that while he tried to be a fun father, he didn’t consider himself to be a good father in the traditional sense. By calling himself "fun," he implies that he was likely more focused on being entertaining or lighthearted with his children, perhaps focusing on enjoyment and playful moments. However, he admits that when it came to making hard decisions—those that required discipline, responsibility, or tough love—he often left those to his wife, indicating a division of responsibilities in their parenting.

Lithgow's statement points to a common dynamic in some families, where one parent, in this case his wife, takes on the more difficult or authoritative role. This can be interpreted as a reflection on gender roles or the natural tendencies in relationships where one partner might lean more toward being the caretaker or decision-maker. By acknowledging this, Lithgow expresses an awareness of how his own approach to parenting might have lacked the balance needed for full parental involvement.

By saying, "the hard decisions always went to my wife," Lithgow also reveals an element of humility in recognizing that there are aspects of parenting where he did not take the lead, possibly leaving his wife to bear more emotional or responsible burdens. This reflection might imply a deeper understanding that effective parenting requires both playfulness and the ability to handle difficult situations with care and authority.

Originating from Lithgow’s own experiences as a parent, this quote showcases a candid self-assessment of his parenting style. It highlights the complexities of parenting dynamics and the often unspoken division of labor in family roles. Lithgow's words are an honest acknowledgment of the different strengths each parent brings to raising children, as well as the importance of balance and shared responsibilities in a healthy family structure.