"Every speaker has a mouth An arrangement rather neat. Sometimes it's filled with wisdom. Sometimes it's filled with feet."

"Do you ever get the feeling that the only reason we have elections is to find out if the polls were right?"

"I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home."

"Washington is a place where politicians don't know which way is up and taxes don't know which way is down."

"I like a very dry wit, not the big kind of humor like Robin Williams. I don't think I'm capable of that."

"If you have the right voice and the right delivery, you're cocky enough, and you pound down on the punch line, you can say anything and make people laugh maybe three times before they realize you're not telling jokes."

"My sense of humor is a turkey, and I pull it out of the oven and baste it in reality."

"It felt as if things were literally slipping through my fingers. Things were just streaming away from me. I lost my sense of humor. I'm still looking for that."