Unjust. How many times I've used that word, scolded myself with it. All I mean by it now is that I don't have the final courage to say that I refuse to preside over violations against myself, and to hell with justice.

Lillian Hellman’s quote explores the tension between justice and personal integrity. She reflects on how often she has used the word unjust to describe situations where she has felt wronged, but now, she realizes that her use of the term was a way of avoiding the deeper confrontation. Hellman suggests that when we experience harm or violations against ourselves, we may initially call it unjust because we feel powerless or unable to act decisively. However, the real issue, as she reveals, is a lack of courage to fully reject being part of those situations, to stand up against them, and to refuse to accept the injustice altogether.

Hellman’s statement moves beyond a simple call for justice; she speaks to the emotional and personal challenge of asserting one’s boundaries. Rather than merely labeling a situation as unjust, she acknowledges that real courage lies in refusing to accept mistreatment. The phrase "to hell with justice" suggests that sometimes the conventional pursuit of fairness or legalistic solutions might not be enough, and the true measure of personal strength is the ability to assert oneself, to reject harm, and to refuse complicity in one's own violation.

Lillian Hellman, an American playwright and author, was known for her sharp commentary on societal issues, particularly in her works such as The Children's Hour and The Little Foxes. Her writings often dealt with themes of moral ambiguity, personal integrity, and the complexities of justice. Hellman herself faced public scrutiny and personal trials, which likely influenced her view that personal dignity and courage are essential, even when justice might seem elusive or difficult to achieve.

Ultimately, Hellman’s quote challenges the notion of justice as an abstract ideal, urging individuals to focus on their own courage and ability to stand firm in the face of mistreatment. By asserting that she would rather reject injustice outright than settle for conventional notions of fairness, Hellman highlights the importance of personal strength and moral clarity in confronting violations against oneself.