Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great.

Absence is to love what wind
Absence is to love what wind
Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great.
Absence is to love what wind
Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great.
Absence is to love what wind
Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great.
Absence is to love what wind
Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great.
Absence is to love what wind
Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great.
Absence is to love what wind
Absence is to love what wind
Absence is to love what wind
Absence is to love what wind
Absence is to love what wind
Absence is to love what wind

The quote "Absence is to love what wind is to fire; it extinguishes the small, it enkindles the great." by Roger de Rabutin draws a metaphor comparing the effects of absence on love to the way wind affects fire. The idea is that when love is weak or not deeply rooted, absence—like a gust of wind—can blow it out, causing it to fade or dissipate. However, when love is strong and intense, absence can act like the wind that fuels a fire, making it burn even brighter and more passionately.

The origin of the quote comes from the understanding of how distance or separation affects relationships. In relationships that are not particularly deep or committed, absence can lead to detachment or a loss of connection. In contrast, in relationships where there is a strong bond, absence can deepen the emotional connection, making the love feel more intense and cherished in its absence. This metaphor underscores the idea that love, like fire, requires the right conditions to thrive, and sometimes those conditions can be provided by space or distance.

Rabutin’s words reflect the notion that absence is a test for the strength of love. It’s a reminder that some loves, when faced with separation, may grow even stronger, while others may fade when not nurtured. The idea of wind as both destructive and strengthening highlights how external forces, like time and distance, can influence a relationship in very different ways depending on its foundation.

Ultimately, this quote speaks to the resilience of love and how it can adapt to various conditions. Just as wind can either quench or stoke a fire, absence can either weaken or strengthen love, depending on the depth of the emotional connection. Rabutin’s metaphor invites us to reflect on how relationships are tested by distance and how some connections endure and grow stronger through time and separation.

Roger de Rabutin
Roger de Rabutin

French - Writer April 13, 1618 - April 9, 1693

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